HomeEntertainmentElection Day

Election Day

It is election time on our island. We should be grateful that there are good and honest people running and that our island elections will not be influenced by money and Russians.

When I was a kid back in Nova Scotia, I loved elections.

My father ran the south end of Halifax for the Liberals.

His campaigns were less than totally scrupulous, but they were a lot of fun.

Dad began campaigns with the appointment of electoral workers.

He hand-picked each one.

In each precinct dad would pick one house where the voting was held. Mrs Kelly was paid a hundred bucks and the voting booth was set up in her parlour.

Mrs Kelly’s parents lived with her, and she had two kids of voting age who lived with her, and her husband voted the way she told him to. For a hundred bucks dad got six votes.

Then dad picked Mrs O’Neil as the head polling clerk. Mrs O’Neil’s parents lived with her too, and so did her two kids, and Mr O’Neil always voted her way.

She got a hundred bucks. Six more votes.

Mrs McGillicuddy was picked as the assistant polling clerk. Mrs Reardon was picked as the polling registrar, and Mrs O’Malley was assistant polling registrar. They each had big Irish families.

A hundred bucks apiece. Eighteen more votes.

Dad began his campaigns with five, good, Irish Catholic women in each precinct and was up 30 votes per precinct before the polls opened.

There were 50 precincts in the south end.

Dad owned 1,500 votes out of the gate.

My friends and I got jobs delivering flyers.

We were paid a huge five bucks a day – enough for a hockey stick and a bag of candy the size of your head.

My friends’ parents didn’t have to buy hockey sticks, and dad scored another twenty votes.

On election day our house was set up with phone lines and people manning the phones and people working the voter lists. Everyone was drinking beer and eating beer nuts. Dad’s poker pal owned the Kentucky Fried Chicken franchise, and he sent over buckets of fried chicken. There was beer nuts and fried chicken everywhere.

I ate better than Christmas.

All over the yard and up and down the street there were taxi cabs.

The cab drivers were precinct captains. Their job was to get out the vote and drive voters to the polls.

Back then hardly anyone had a car, but nobody walked to vote. The phone workers sent the cabs to pick them up.

When the cabs picked up the voters there was a little paper bag in the back seat.

In the paper bag there was a mickey of rum and a pair of nylons.

My earliest election memory is sitting in my pajamas with dad’s buddies in the basement filling up little bottles of rum from big bottles of rum.

Dad liked it when I filled the bottles because I didn’t drink the rum.

The most exciting part of election day were the ringers.

They called them ringers because they were dead ringers for voters who were dead.

When Mrs Reardon, the voting registrar, went around to register the voters in each house, she registered Mrs Martin’s dear departed father, Jack.

Jack Martin was a good Liberal. He was such a good Liberal that he was still voting 10 years after he had died.

One of the cab drivers would go into the poll and say he was Jack Martin, get his ballot and vote. Most of the drivers voted five or six times.

I suspect our Island elections will be less fun than my dad’s.

I miss my dad. He has been gone for some time now. I take comfort from knowing he may still be voting back home.

Remember dad’s election advice next election day.

“Vote early, and vote often,” and drop by the Doctor’s Office for a big post-election whoop-up.

Most Popular

More from Author

A writing respite

Cooking and writing are fun. It is time for more cooking fun. The...

A belated Mother’s Day missive

People ask me if my mom taught me how to cook. Truth...

The Stanley Cup and poutine

Canada's two greatest exports have a shared heritage. I am talking poutine...

They are leaving… you can come out now

For years now the Beach Bistro runs an ad every May. It...

Floridian Mortgage wins championship

ANNA MARIA – Spring has sprung and winter sports at The Center are coming to a close, with team Floridian Mortgage earning the win against team Moss Builders Thursday night in the adult co-ed flag football championship game. The top two teams in the league matched up in...

Man completes Chamber passport program in five hours

ANNA MARIA ISLAND - The annual Anna Maria Island Chamber of Commerce’s Passport Program is a fun way for residents and visitors to the Island to get out and discover Island businesses with a passport offered for free by the chamber. Participants are encouraged to get their passports...

One ARK Foundation raises funds for foster families

live music, delicious food and spirited fundraising as the One ARK Foundation held its second annual “Kindness Matters Extravaganza” at The Cheesecake Cutie & Cafe on March 21. “One ARK” stands for “one act of random kindness” and is a newly-established 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization founded by The Cheesecake...

Save our homes

This column should be titled “Save our Taxes,” since that’s what we’re really talking about. However, saving on property taxes is part of the Save Our Homes benefits and portability transfers are another piece of this law. In January of 2008, the Florida Legislature passed legislation that allows...

 Reel Time: Salon fundraiser meets with success

Salon (noun) - a conversational gathering of notables held at the home of a prominent person. On Saturday afternoon, Suncoast Waterkeeper held its Suncoast Salon fundraiser at the Sarasota home of Anna Maria residents Bill and Debbie Partridge. The event was a sellout and attracted some of...

Temporary paid parking vendors hired

BRADENTON BEACH – City commissioners considered four temporary use parking permits at the March 21 commission meeting and after much discussion, approved three with stipulations, denying one. Permit applications were submitted by developer Shawn Kaleta for temporary parking lots at 102 Third St. N., 207 Church Ave. and...

Fire department sued over rental regulations

BRADENTON – Almost a year after passing a resolution changing the district’s approach to taxing and inspecting vacation rental properties in residential areas, West Manatee Fire Rescue is receiving pushback from one rental owner. During a March 19 commission meeting, the district’s attorney, Maggie Mooney, informed the board...

Bridge Street traffic, parking among commission concerns

BRADENTON BEACH – In what was an unusually lengthy, seven-hour city commission meeting that began at noon on March 21, commissioners dove into parking and traffic issues, pickleball and organ donation. BRIDGE STREET ONE WAY? A Bridge Street business owner asked the commission to consider making Bridge Street one...

Scaccianoce new Bradenton Beach commissioner

BRADENTON BEACH – Ward 1 has a new commissioner. The application for commissioner by business owner and former Manatee County records manager Deborah Scaccianoce was approved by the commission and she was sworn in at its March 21 meeting. She filled the vacant seat left by former Commissioner Jake...

Kruse talks beach parking, Island consolidation

HOLMES BEACH – About two dozen people came out on March 20 to meet with Manatee County Commissioner George Kruse, bringing their questions for the candidate, who is seeking re-election in November. Kruse held a town hall meeting at the Island Branch Library where he answered every question...

Commissioners deny bids for paid parking

BRADENTON BEACH – Rather than partnering with an outside vendor as planned, commissioners are now considering city-managed paid parking lots throughout Bradenton Beach. The city had put out a Request for Proposals (RFP) on Feb. 9 to “Provide the City with a complete parking management and enforcement system...